Corrupt A wish

Granted but you can only use them in the cartoon online and good luck getting in the computer world...

i wish i was Dr Who's new companion

granted but i ask
so the chance for that were lost
i wish for a nice dream

Granted, but you dream of nothing but smuppets flaunting their soft, plushy behinds all night long.

I wish for an endless supply of strawberry milk.

granted but then u get sick from it

i wish for a cookie

Granted, it's a chocolate chip cookie. But I'm not entirely sure if those are actual cocolate chips.

I wish I knew everything. Literally fucking goddamn everything.

Granted but if you knew "Literally fuckinging goddamn evrything" then someone might make you a sidekick character in some lame game, like the Oslen Twins games

i wish i could have a do over of any day in my life knowing what went wrong, so i could fix it

Granted, but then you won't exist in the alpha timeline anymore. Weird Time Shit likes to do that, temporal inevitability and whatnot.

I wish Ray was here.

aww she is, but she didn't sign in and has just been watching u suffer...

i wish all my umh friends, and Ray's umh friends would all get together for a day of non-stop questing (this includes Kristia, Niarty and Forte too)

granted, but we got distracted talking and having fun and forgot to quest

I wish to work less time

Granted, and just as logic would have it, you get paid less. This drop in income impacts your life, forcing you to make a choice: Redouble your hours to compensate for the lost income, or get on your knees and start polishing...

Spoiler:

I wish to meet the SuperBlueBadger.

granted u get the misty badge
i wish for mickey the mouse

Granted, but you got Mickey the Rat instead.

I wish I could exist as multiple instances within a single timeline, able to merge and split at will in order to merge memories, so I could be the ultimate multitasker.

granted but ur clones and u will die in 10 secs
iwish for a tornado

Granted, but this tornado is actually a portal to a magical realm where the streets are paved with golden bricks and you're constantly followed by a scarecrow, a tin man, and a cowardly lion.

I wish I had a flying broomstick.

granted but it only flys if its plug into the wall
i wish for this hw chaos to end

Granted, but it's immediately followed by gravitational chaos.

I wish for world peace.

granted but ur the only one who doesnt live in peace
i wish for a puppy

Granted, but that puppy is one of Satan's minions and you are forced to kill it to save the world.

I wish for a wired 360 controller.

granted but it doesnt work
i wish the dog wasnt satanic
(that pretty sad thing i dont wanna kill a animal D: )

Yeah, but it was some demon in disguise, like Frank from MIB. Just some satanic demon in a dog costume.

Granted, but while still believing it to be a devil dog, you kill it and later discover it to be a double agent that was actually working for God. Looks like you killed an angel dog... Whoops.
I don't know why shit is so goddamn grimdark.

I wish I knew what the fuck inspired that story above.

granted Drs run tests and find u have an evil gene and start giving u gene therapy but it makes u huge like the Hulk but it's all air not muscle and some joker decides to prick u wt a pin...uk the balloon effect? phooooooooooooooooooooooooooosssh all over the room and out a window up into a tree..

i wishi had a controller for the ps3 that never needed recharged, it always had a full battery

Granted, but the cable keeping the controller charged is only 2in long and permanently fixed to it.

I wish my sis didn't like King of the Hill so much. I wanna play Nier.

granted but now she has nothing to do but watch you play...and comment

i wish you have a weird and awesome 3D dream (goodnight)

Granted, but we share this dream with Freddy Krueger and he tricks you into visiting The Land of Stumps and Dismay.

I wish I could manifest stuff from my dreams in the real world.

granted but you dream of a evil monster that wants to eat u and comes out of ur dream to eat u

i wish for easy transportation